mini me

when half-empty (glass) me meets half-full (glass) me:

me1: i'm unhappy

me2: why?
me1: dunno
me2: how come you say you are unhappy but you dunno why?
me1: well, i feel lonely
me2: what lonely? you have fam and friends, don't you?
me1: yes, but... i feel strange
me2: what strange? it's obvious that they're your comfort zone
me1: yes of course, but well...
me2: what well? you have so many good friends, no?
me1: i've so many good friends, true. but, dunno, feel like stranger
me2: i guess you're just feeling uncomfortable about yourself, am i right or wrong?
me1: of course you're right. you're me, remember? we both are we
me2: weird isn't it? haha
me1: yes, so weird
me2: okay. back to topic
me1: i think i need a change
me2: what change?
me1: me
me2: i don't understand
me1: me too. i just feel i wanna get out from this uncomfortable comfort zone
me2: i see. like you pretend to be okay living with unhappy feeling searching for nothingness yet you can't find anything. is it like that
me1: yeah, sorta
me2: so how?
me1: what how?
me2: how you change?
me1: haven't i just said i dunno?
me2: me am clueless too
me1: so we both are clueless. how pathetic
me2: i don't say we're pathetic
me1: so what are we? i mean what am i? geez, this conversation is really weird
me2: we both are della, right? a 'curious cat' with 'ignorance is a bliss' attitude while it comes to 'what people say'
me1: am i? are we? i care what people say. well, lately
me2: what on earth we're talking about?
me1: ignorance is bliss, no?
me2: err.. i guess i just lose a track
me1: what track?
me2: forget it. all i wanna say is i think what makes you, us, unhappy is we care too much about what people say while they even say nothing at all. we care too much about being flawless while you, us, know it's impossible. we care too much about how to be impressive, to impress people, to have more compliments and less critics
me1: am i? are we?
me2: not me, haha
me1: but you ARE me. how come it's not you?
me2: i'm the 'half-full' (glass) remember?
me1: well, "when the glass is half-empty at least you can't drown"
me2: okay, let's just stop debating. aren't we here to solve our problem?
me1: i guess we can add "we care too much on how to be better than someone instead of be a better me, us"
me2: clever you. or can i shortened it to 'envy'?
me1: yes, too much envies. there's SOOO~ much great people out there. but great us, only one
me2: you're starting to 'pour water'
me1: what water?
me2: water tab. okay, ignore it
me1: anyway, how about friends issue?
me2: hmm..
me1: why you're hmm-ing?
me2: in this case i agree with you. i'm not saying we don't have friends. we do have friends. a lot. a lot of good friends. but real friend? best friend? do we have any? and have we become best friend to our best friend if there's any?
me1: haha. funny. don't you think we're like changing part?
me2: what part?
me1: half-empty and half-full (glass) part
me2: half plus half equals one, no? ;p
me1: err.. okay. YOU are ME. I am YOU. how come we're not one?
me2: we are both an alter ego of each other
me1: can we just continue our discussion?
me2: okay. well, i think we must stop searching 'who is my real friend? best friend? in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health'
me1: it's marriage vow, by the way
me2: yeah, just a little ice breaking
me1: err.. i guess this monologue is getting weird word by word -___-
me2: that's our mark *grin
me1: mark time mark. one two three four. ANYWAAAYYY~ i agree. i guess if we wanna find real friend, be a real friend first
me2: exactly. are we a good friend?
me1: i guess so. well, dunno for sure actually. it's not our part to answer it. it's our friends' part
me2: SOOO~ are we happy yet?
me1: just pray this is not temporary
me2: dear God, let me, us, be happy all the time. let me, us, can be useful for others. let me, us, live and love to the fullest happiness
me1: amin. anyway, why are we praying?
me2: YOU TOLD ME!!! geez, i feel strange
me1: haven't i told you before? hehe *big grin
me2: are we schizophrenic?
me1: i don't want to
me2: me too
me1: me three
me2: del... stop it
me1: hey hey, it's just monologue, okay? we ignore this case for so long. in fact, we just can't. be honest to ourself that we...
me2: are schizophrenic?
me1: no. we are lovable
me2: ewh, you wish
me1: we wish ;p
me2: anyway, this monologue-catharsis-writing thing makes me feels gooooooooood
me1: thanks to me. i start this thing first
me2: okay, thank you my dear lovely me. i love youuu. smooch smooch. oh fuck, this is really gross. feel like lesbian -___-
me1: no it's not a lesbian. it's a love for ourself. our super great self
me2: err.. okay. gooosh, how on earth i have 'me' like you inside me?!
me1: cause we are quirky yet so dazzling and amazing. just the way i aaam
me2: over confident
me1: aren't we here to boost up confidence?
me2: yes but it's supposed to be MY part to say that. i AM the half-full (glass)
me1: we're changing part, remember?
me2: i'm goldfish. hardly remember anything
me1: i'm elephant. easily remember anything
me2: aren't we human? oh fuck, why the hell i'm continuing this rubbish talk?
me1: cause this is fun! feels like a long time we don't do this. i really miss it. i miss you, della
me2: well honestly i miss you too, della. can we hug each other?
me1: how?
me2: dunno. just feel like hugging you
me2: you read my mind
me1: i'm mind reader
me1: hehehe *big big grin
me2: can we stop this talk?
me1: no! i still wanna talk to you. i miss you so much
me2: anyway, i hate mosquitos
me1: me too! and i hate that i hate mosquitos
me2: well, we aren't talking about it, by the way. you're random. i'm random. we're random
me1: i'm della
me2: me too am della
me1: WOW, we are two in one person! cool! high five!
me2: yeah yeah yeah, whatever
me1: i'm tired
me2: tired about what?
me1: tired being fake
me2: are we?
me1: dunno. are we real or fake?
me2: or
me1: you're not answering
me2: well, i guess you're tired about finding out 'i'm real or fake?'. so let's take a break
me1: how?
me2: let's laugh at ourself. our-used-to-be-stupid-self
me1: hahaha
me2: hahaha
me1: why isn't it funny?
me2: isn't it?
me1: dunno. deep down my heart, i'm crying. crying over meee~
me2: so let's cry out loud
me1: hiks hiks
me2: hiks hiks. okay, this is stupid
me1: yeah. i don't feel like crying
me2: haaah~ why you're so wishy washy?!
me1: you too. cause you are me
me2: you suck
me1: i'm vacuum cleaner
me2: okay, forget it. enough. it's annoying
me1: orange
me2: i'm out
me1: take me out
me2: ewh
me1: in that place, i feel like stranger
me2: in what place? take me out?
me1: take him out. damn us! can we be serious to ourself at least once in a lifetime?! we're now in a serious talk, remember?
me2: hmm.. i see
me1: what see?
me2: seefood
me1: it's delicious! seriously, what see?
me2: what you see
me1: oh you know me so well *sarcastic
me2: girl i heart you *brb vomiting
me1: *brb vomiting back
me2: well, i guess it's just the beginning. we'll get used to it
me1: hope so
me2: anyway, how about ending this conversation?
me1: okay. thanks for the mind-sharing
me2: your welcome
me1: bye. see you on another unstable-teenage-drama-mind
me2: bye. see you