On Being Realistic

"It's hard to wait around for something you know might never happen. But it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want"

I know how it feels when you just can't give up trying. You try and fail and try again and fail again and never stop trying until you reach the limit. Sounds familiar? Of course it's an "OF COURSE!" for me. With bold capital letters and exclamation mark. Because I was born stubborn, haha.

Like my obsession to be Garuda Indonesia's flight attendant. I tried the walk-in interview 3 times already, but well... just my luck. Like my will to finish my english class in ILP after postpone it for 9 freaking years.

Like my desire to be JFC volunteer though I know I'm old enough for doing voluntary. Like being a color guard squad in MBUI after waiting patiently for 5 years. Like joining jazz ballet class on my 20-es. Comparing to those teenagers that already start from kids, it's actually late. But well, better late than never, yes?

But sometimes, life teaches us to stop. I learn it hard way. And for me, it's not about giving up. It's about being realistic. To try forever, ignore 'universe sign' and our body limit, and have a 'blind optimism' is such a fatality.

Last night, I had a talk with my friend. She told me that she already quit dancing. She said, after years, the condition is still the same. Then she decided to quit. After her last show.

I don't know what she's been through but it breaks my heart when hearing the news. I feel her. Been there done that. An injury may recover, but the scar remains forever. And it's not easy to accept the fact that things won't be the same anymore.

But anyway, again, it's not about giving up. It's about being realistic.